Sunset High & Our Bodies Low
by sp0by
Summary: Spencer and Toby have been strained like crazy lately. When Spencer confesses that she cheated on him with Jonny, their relationship has a downfall. They both must find a way to pick up the broken pieces of their relationship. (Post 5x20)
1. Chapter 1

**Hello, guys. This is just a continuation of 5x20, so it's post that episode. I hope you all will like this fanfic.**

Spencer had been crying. Maybe she made mistakes, but he had made quite a few lately, too. She felt more like a distant friend than his girlfriend, and that's what really hurt. She knew what she did that night was wrong, and she wasn't going to blame Toby. She wasn't going to say that he had 'pushed her into Jonny's arms', and 'he deserved it'. Even if they were fighting, he didn't deserve it. No one deserved to be cheated on, fighting or not. She didn't know how she felt about the kiss with Jonny, though. It was short and unexplained. He walked away before she could say anything, and she probably wouldn't see him again for a very long time.

She didn't want to lose Jonny's friendship. A romantic relationship with him? That was what she wasn't sure of. Being kissed by him felt good. She barely had time to truly kiss back, but she wasn't in denial that she didn't want it at all. Because she knew that if she truly hated it, she would have stopped him. Why didn't she hate it? She hated the thought of knowing what she did to her real boyfriend, but she felt like her relationship with Toby was the only thing making her kiss with Jonny wrong. Part of her wanted to try something new. Another part of her wanted to work everything with Toby out.

Leaving a thousand messages and calls didn't seem to help her get his attention, though. He had been avoiding them for weeks, it was no surprise that he was still avoiding them. She was just laying down on her couch, thinking about it. She was leaving for a college interview in London the day after, but she didn't know if she was ready to go without understanding and letting go. She needed closure on the situation with Toby and Jonny. She needed to talk to Toby before things became even worse than they already were. She needed to tell him about what happened. They needed to talk.

Tired of waiting for him to come to her, Spencer got up from the couch, and got in her car. She was going to drive to Toby's workplace. She was going to talk to him herself, even if it killed her. Even if he ignored her, even if he said go away, even if he broke up with her. She was going to tell him about the kiss. She needed to get it off of her chest. She needed to hear him fight for her. To show her that he at least cared enough to be jealous. Show some indicator that he was still filled with some feelings for her. She missed his affection for her being clearly displayed.

"What are you doing here?" he demanded, his eyes going wide when he saw her at the police station. His voice became a whisper as he said, "I thought I told you to walk away."

"I'm not walking away this time. Tell Tanner you need a break now," she ordered fiercely. She wasn't playing games anymore. They really needed to talk things out. "Because this can't wait. It really, truly can't wait any longer. You may have told me to walk away from that scene last night, but I'm not walking away right now. We have to talk."

He sighed before saying sternly, "Spencer, I told you that I can't do this right now."

"That's what I've been hearing a lot from you lately," she said, folding her arms. "It's always 'I can't do this right now'. Okay, then tell me when you can. I'm leaving for an interview in London tomorrow, which you would know, if you had called, regarding all the times you said 'I'll call you later'. I have to talk to you before then."

"Look, I have to handle things this way. There are things you just don't understand right now, and I can't talk about this here. Please. I... can't," he repeated, running a hand through his hat. "Go home, Spencer. Just, go home."

Spencer brushed right past him, but she wasn't leaving the station just yet. She wasn't giving up. If Toby knew what she was going to say, then he would probably listen up. She had to let him hear it. So, she barged right into Tanner's office, much to Toby's dismay. He was mouthing words and begging her not to enter, but she didn't seem to care. She was determined to have this conversation right at that very moment.

"Spencer?" Tanner questioned, looking up curiously. "What brings you here today?"

"This is about Toby," she said, folding her arms. "I know you have a lot of work to do. I get it, that's what happens at a police station. But he's always busy. And he's my boyfriend. I have to talk to him. I'm having a serious crisis, and I need my boyfriend for just one minute. He keeps insisting that he's busy doing your work. Can you please, please just let him talk to me for a moment?"

Tanner raised an eyebrow before answering with a fake smile, "Oh, I wouldn't want to disturb your relationship. Please, go ahead."

Toby showed up at the doorway of Tanner's office, wide-eyes.

"What is going on here?" he asked nervously.

"Your girlfriend wanted you to have a break to talk to her," Tanner explained with a smirk. "Surely, I have no problem with it, Officer Cavanaugh. Be back soon."

She didn't even ask him, she just grabbed his arm and pulled him outside. They left the station doors. She needed to make sure that she didn't put his job in risk. Tanner could probably use anything she said against her. Spencer understood where Toby was coming from, just a little bit. But she didn't understand the full story, and she didn't know if she ever would. All she knew was that Jonny was gone because of Toby, and she had made one major wrong decision. Also, she knew that she had no clue what she wanted from either Toby or Jonny.

"That was a risky move you just made!" Toby warned. "I could have gotten in trouble with Tanner. She barely trusts me as it is. I didn't need it becoming worse."

"Can you please tell me if I'm your girlfriend or just some person you scream at occasionally?" Spencer pleaded. "I'm sick of waiting around. We haven't spoke in weeks, and when we do, it's awkward. I want things to be right again. You let me down when you made Jonny move out. I lost a friend. He can't afford to stay with me anymore because of you."

"I'm trying as hard as I can to keep you off of Tanner's radar, why can't you see that!?" Toby cried, shaking his head. "I didn't expect you to understand, anyways. And I wasn't trying to take Jonny away from your house. I didn't mean anything like that. I was responding to a call I got. I knew you couldn't afford to be arrested with your Bethany bail, and that's why I let you go."

"You didn't care that you left him homeless and broke?" Spencer asked, folding her arms and raising her eyebrows. "You didn't care that I care about him? It felt biased to me. You should have taken me with him."

"No, I wasn't going to do that. I didn't arrest him to get back at you, or show you who is in charge!" Toby yelled. "I have a job to do, and I can't keep breaking the rules. You both committed a crime."

"You don't get it," Spencer said, shaking her head.

"Yeah, I think I do. You vandalized Hollis with him, and tried to steal back the painting," Toby said, sighing. "Whether or not that art belonged to the business or not, it didn't belong to you both. Vandalizing Hollis was already a crime. It wasn't your property."

"You can't do this to Jonny!" Spencer cried.

"Since when did it become all about damn Jonny?" Toby asked, swallowing hard.

"Since when did it become all about your damn job?" Spencer fired back, giving him a look of disgust and disapproval. "I'm pissed about this."

"Maybe it was biased not to arrest you, but you got out of it. If any other cop came, you both would have been taken to the station. And Jonny would have taken bail and been exactly where he is now. Everything, for you, would have been ruined. Tanner would have exactly what she needs to pin Bethany and Mona on you," Toby explained. "I'm doing this because I want to be on the inside. It's not all about the job, it's about you. But sometimes I have to keep a certain level of loyalty to the position I hold."

"Don't pretend like this is all for me, because I know it's not," she said, shaking her head. "You told me it was, but I'm not so sure anymore. I'm falling apart. And you know who has been there for me all this time? Jonny."

"Did you come here to rub this in to me that I can't always be there for you?" Toby asked, flaring his nostrils.

"No, I didn't. And you're never there for me anymore, actually," she snapped. "I came here because I thought we could talk things out, but clearly, it's becoming worse. And by the way, Jonny kissed me. I didn't kiss back. But I didn't stop him."

And suddenly a knot grew in Toby's stomach. What did she just say to him? It sounded like the description of another guy kissing her, and her cheating. He knew what he was hearing. His heart never hurt so badly. He watched her. She stood there, waiting for a reaction. He couldn't tell if she was anxious, but it certainly didn't seem like it. He felt like she wanted to make him angry.

"Why are you telling me about this?" he demanded, his breathing getting angrier and heavier. "Damn it, Spencer! Why the hell?"

"I don't like keeping secrets from you."

He slammed his palm against his forehead, running his hand down his face. Her heart started beating faster. She knew this wasn't going to end well. He was truly upset at the moment, and she felt stupid for not completely understanding why. She knew it was because she cheated, but she couldn't help but blame him for a part of it. It was wrong. It wasn't all his doing that she cheated. She could have stopped him.

"Just leave, Spencer."

"What?" she choked out.

"Just freaking leave!" Toby practically screamed. She had never seen his eyes so strained. She could tell he was going to cry. "I told you once that I could never forgive a cheater, and that was when I thought you cheated on me with Wren. When I found out you didn't, I was uncontrollably happy. I never thought I would find the day where you actually did this to me." He stared at the floor before continuing, "I may not be the greatest guy to you right now, believe me, I know, and I have no justifications for some of the things I've said and done in my past. But the one thing I would never do is break my loyalty to you. Never. Not once. I knew something was happening between you two. It's probably my fault, but that doesn't give you the right."

She didn't even know what to say. She felt guilty, but she felt stirred up.

"Please, just go away. I can't even look at you right now," he quietly said. "I don't think I'm going to be able to do this anymore."

"Toby, please," she pleaded. "Don't."

"Leave," he said again. "Maybe I did a lot wrong for the past few weeks, but that doesn't give you a free pass to lock lips with another guy. Leave."

And she did leave.

**Thank you if you read! Please leave a review. I will try and update soon. There will be more, so don't worry if your Spoby heart hurts, since they have broke up for now in my fic. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for your feedback, it was really appreciated! Here is the next chapter. I hope you will enjoy this one, too.**

Spencer was numb as she made her way back home. Her mother wasn't home, and her father never was anymore, anyways. Jonny was gone. Toby was gone. She had lost everything. She wondered if this mess wouldn't have been made if A wasn't in her life. She got a message on her phone, from her mom.

Don't forget to pack your bags. Your flight leaves tomorrow, right in the afternoon.

She sighed, tossing her phone on her bed. Then, she began packing her suitcase full of clothes. She was spending the weekend in London. She wasn't sure if Melissa was still there, but that wasn't her reason for going, anyways. As strange as it was, Wren had gotten her a college interview with a prestigious school.

The next afternoon, she was meeting up with her friends before she left. She wasn't in the mood for A detective business. She was all worn out from the break up, as well as the constant drama in her romantic life and college life. Just her life in general felt complicated.

"She didn't commit this crime, and neither did Mike, now with what we know," Emily said, looking at the floor. "We can't let her rot in that jail cell. She doesn't deserve it. No one does. Not even her."

"We should visit her," Hanna suggested. "I've only been there once, but that was when I thought she was guilty. With a new thought in mind, I think it could be helpful. What does the brain think about the plan?"

Spencer looked up and said, "Hmm?"

"Spencer..." Hanna said, raising her eyebrows. "You're usually in hyperactive detective mode, and now you're zoning out. You always have an A plan."

"You guys can visit Alison, but I can't. Remember? I'm going to London for the weekend. I have my college interview there," Spencer reminded, scratching her head.

"I didn't know a little college interview distracts you this much. I didn't think anything could stop THE Spencer Hastings from playing major detective," Emily laughed. "Have you gotten to see Toby yet? You should probably head over to his place now if you want to give him a goodbye before you go."

"We're still not on the best of terms," Spencer muttered, even though she knew that was an understatement. "You know what? I have to go."

Hanna, Emily, and Aria were confused to why she was acting this way, but they didn't know how to stop her.

"I'm going to talk to her," Aria said, knowing she was the closest to Spencer. "She is really acting weird. Whenever she acts weird, it's always a sign. Remember? When she thought Toby was A? When she was on drugs again? There's something going on."

Aria followed her outside before she could get in her car. She grabbed the taller girl's arm, pulling her back, forcing her to stand face-to-face.

"Hey! What is wrong, Spence?" Aria asked, coaxing hazel eyes in place. "You can tell me anything."

Spencer started breaking down into tears. She unexpectedly pulled Aria in for a hug, letting her salty tears stain the hazel-eyed girl's blouse. Aria hugged her back, not caring that she didn't know what was wrong. All she knew was that her best friend was sad, and she wanted to be there for her.

"Did something happen with Toby?" Aria asked, pulling back from the hug.

"We... we broke up," she confessed, sobbing again. "He broke up with me last night."

"Oh, Spencer," Aria coaxed, stroking her back gently. "It's okay. It really is. He loves you. What happened?"

"We've been fighting ever since that knife fight. And he's been ignoring me for his police work. I've tried to confront him so many God damn times, but he never 'could do it'!" Spencer cried, shaking her head. "So, I started spending time with Jonny, the guy who used to live in my barn. But then Toby was a jackass to Jonny, and things got even worse. My mom kicked Jonny out, and we had to say goodbye. But then Jonny kissed me. And I went to confront Toby. I wanted to work everything out, but my concerns weren't being fixed. I confessed about the kiss to Toby, and he got pissed, and then he dumped me!" Spencer explained, still sobbing. "I feel like such a cheater!"

"Hey, it's fine," Aria promised. "He won't be mad at you forever. Do you like this Jonny guy? Where did he go?"

"Jonny isn't coming back. It doesn't matter if I like him," Spencer said, shaking her head.

"But do you?" Aria asked.

"No!" Spencer denied. "I love Toby. I always will. I just... I did have feelings for Jonny. But not because I really do like him. Because he was there for me when Toby wasn't. I wasn't sure if I wanted it to happen, because it was more a feeling of, if Toby isn't here, then I can flirt with another guy. But I regret it. I shouldn't have cheated on him."

"Maybe you should talk to him," Aria suggested.

"I don't think he'll look me in the eyes after what I've done to him," Spencer said, sighing. "I need to leave."

She got into her car, much to Aria's pleas for her to stay. She drove to Toby's loft, even though she knew that was a place she was no longer welcome. She was hoping that maybe he wouldn't be working at the police station for one minute. But she knew he was always working. She had to try anyways. She didn't want to lose him.

She knocked on the door of the loft, but nobody answered.

"Toby, please open up."

She assumed he was at work again. But she knew she needed to say something before she left. Suddenly, she remembered that Toby had given her a spare key, during that time that she stayed at his loft to get away from her dad. She nervously smiled to herself, unlocking the door with the key she got from her purse.

She looked around the empty loft. He wasn't ignoring her knocks, at least. The room was trashed. There were beer bottles everywhere. Liquor. Alcohol. She didn't even know that Toby was apparently an extreme drinker. She furrowed her eyebrows. She knew he wasn't an alcoholic. The only thing she could think of was the stress of his job and their break up making him drink, but she didn't know if he cared enough for that.

Her plan was to leave him a note. He would have to return to his loft after work at some point, and maybe an apology note would change his mind. Maybe he would give her one more chance to prove herself loyal. She didn't know, but she wanted to see what would happen. She wanted to take a risk.

She walked to the counter to get a pen out of his drawer, but then glanced over at the trash can. It wasn't like her to be a girl that dug through the trash can, but she couldn't help it when she noticed a bouquet of roses with an attached note in the trash.

I know I haven't been the best boyfriend lately, but it's all for you. There's nothing I want more than to protect you. I love you so much. Please let me make it up to you. Once this is all over, there won't be anything that I won't do to make it up to you. I'm always yours, Spencer.

-T

She started to tear up when she read the note. If she hasn't screwed up, Toby would have apologized to her with a bouquet of roses!? The only thing that made sense to her now was that he was absolutely pissed about her cheating, so he threw the flowers and note he got for her away, out of anger. And then he drank away all night.

She swallowed hard before grabbing a pen from the drawer, as well as a piece of paper. Without thinking, she scribbled down whatever thoughts and emotions came to head. It was about how sorry she was, and how she would do anything to fix them. She didn't want to read it over to herself, because she already felt mortified for writing it in the first place. Spencer fled his loft room, leaving the note on the kitchen counter.

"You're late!" Veronica yelled, urging her daughter to get in the car. "That Jonny boy really was a bad influence. Get in, I'll go grab your bag."

"He wasn't a bad person," she defended, turning around to face her mother.

"Spencer, we're not going to have this argument right now, whether he was your friend or not," Veronica warned. "You're going to miss your flight if you don't hurry up. Come on."

She did get in the car. Her mother came down with her suitcase, ready to drive her to the airport. She stared at her ticket to London, before remembering her conversation with Toby when they were having sex one time.

'If you ever go to London again, you're taking me with you, and we're never coming back.'

She said that to him. Sure, it was in the moment of passion, but still, she didn't think she would be flying to London alone. Or at least without saying goodbye to his face. She knew she wasn't expected to say goodbye to him, since they technically weren't dating anymore, but she still felt like she owed that to him.

On her flight to London, she couldn't stop thinking about Toby and Jonny. Maybe she couldn't be with Toby. He had done nothing to apologize for what he had done to her, whether he wrote that romantic note or not. Jonny pushed her on the edge. She had fun with him. She found her wild side for once. Toby wanted her to stay within the lines, never break the rules. She knew he just did that for her safety, but she wanted to have fun. She wondered what it would have been like to date Jonny for real. Would it have been an amazing relationship?


End file.
